I am currently PUPO. On the 2ww.
For those not familiar with ttc or IF terminology, here in plain English:
TTC- Trying to Conceive, IF – Infertility, PUPO – pregnant unless proven otherwise (usually by POAS, or peeing on a stick), 2ww – the two week wait (from the date of your LMP, or last menstrual period – to see if the method of conception you chose has worked or not).
I had my last remaining embryo transferred last Friday, and am now waiting for any twinges, symptoms and the ultimate result of the pregnancy test I can take after Sunday.
I also feel a bit in limbo. Not only based on the unsettling situation due to Brexit, but also because of our uncertain future in terms of where we will ultimately live.
It is hard to do airbnb for any length of time in a small family home shared with guests. It is hard to keep a place tidy with a baby, even more so with a toddler who has more toys than sense and less room to play in than an average guinea pig.
It is draining to deal with enquiries that don’t turn into bookings, and most guests don’t much improve my feelings of loneliness.
This year, I have already cut back on the guests by raising my price to a level that most guests don’t feel is justified by the space I rent out, and had one returning cash-payer (a very sweet scientist who attends conferences in London on a regular basis and feels more like a distant friend now) as well as a group of 3 girls while I was away over Christmas.
Those girls only stayed 3 nights and felt no qualms about telling me in my review that the space wasn’t well suited for 3 people. No idea what they mean, or what they thought they were renting!
The flat when we are not at home sleeps 4 (or 4 and a baby), but this is to be used as a place to spend the nights mostly, while daytimes should be full to the brim by exploring London from a convenient central location. Seems like this was lost on those girls.
I also decided to be a good and generous person by inviting a 20 year old girl to stay, who I’d met through mutual friends during our time away for Christmas.
She wanted to stay for 2 nights before continuing her travels, and she was a lovely guest with a positive nature. However she didn’t as much as rinse her own cup during her stay, and she didn’t bring a gift as one might expect someone could reasonably consider offering for some free accommodation. Such as, perhaps, a bottle of wine, some chocolates, flowers or a book… It’s not Valentine’s and she’s not my lover, but still. I was raised not to go visit people empty-handed.
So her stay was entertaining, but left a slightly bitter note in my mouth about hosting people for free again. After all, she had £77 spare to spend the day with Harry Potter!
Some ideas about places we might move to in the short-term were
a) a flat share with a single dad (unfortunately he smokes, which would make me feel very uncomfortable as I hate the smell of smoke on my possessions)
b) a house share with a couple and their kids, as well as a part-time single dad (absolutely enormous house and close to my mum’s, but in another country and insufficient room for all our possessions).
c) stay put and try to enjoy it more, make (even!) more plans to have friends round, or spend weekends visiting people.
In the longer term I would like to own a bigger house I can share on a more permanent basis with another adult and child, and potentially a holiday rental (annexe) in the garden to continue airbnb, in a place less expensive than London.
Mortgage free, since 1) I can’t get a mortgage and 2) all the money coming in from rentals would be my income to live on.
Oh yes about the baby—- I couldn’t conceive paying £330 annually for indefinite cryo storage of a frozen embryo when there was no guarantee it would ultimately work. My toddler wants a sibling. 2 kids seem right somehow. I won’t always have the energy to keep up with my son, and to be honest I like to read a book or newspaper while the kid/s play.
Our last summer holiday showed the marked difference of me and Mum 1 to Mum 2, who was overly keen to fill every spare minute with crafts, games and activities whilst Mum1 and I took turns in the hammock with a schlocky book.
So I am planning on renting out my womb for around 9 months or so, to give my son the ultimate gift, and me a lifetime of holidays reading in hammocks, whilst the heir and the spare entertain each other. At least it’s a nice idea.